Coaching Videos & Tips - November 25 2021 No. 732




Beyond our basic needs as human beings lies a world of normal crazy want... but what would you prefer? Today's video explores exactly what I mean by that!





This Week's Reflection


By chance (perhaps!), I've had a number of conversations with different people over the last week with regard to alcohol addiction or, at least, alcohol dependence. And, obviously, such conversations explore the related wants, need and cravings - some of which are perceived, some of which, through regular use or abuse, are actually physical in terms of the neural pathways' receptors.

As a resulf of those physical issues, giving up such an addiction or dependence often requires focused treatment. And, yet, in each conversation, the dependence or addiction inevitably resulted in a broader conversation about needs, wants, cravings and perceived addictions.

In this regard, I'm talking about, for example, our addiction to what deMello calls "the drug of approval" or, from a different perspective, how we become attached to what I refer to in this week's video as "must haves". These attachments are very different from the physical addiction to a narcotic - they are simply habit and, as such, can simply be put down.

This applies even to the most fundamental of our everyday bad habits - our addiction to our sense of self or, more precisely, our Conceptual Self. This can simply be put down too. In doing so, you liberate yourself.

There is a popular myth that it takes twenty one days to break a habit - obviously not the case in relation to the aforementioned narcotic addiction. But it is just a popular myth. Although the vast majority of the research into how meditation alters the brain explores that change over an eight week period, all that reseach only takes eight weeks as the benchmark because the original Mindfulness-Based Stress Management Programme was of eight weeks' duration.

The latest research indicates that the brain shows signs of restructuring after just five days meditation - obviously five days in a row! That provides us with the catalyst for taking today on its own merits and doing what we need to do today to, as I said, simply put those bad habits down.




This Week's Quick Tip


Reflect on the times in your life that you experienced effortless happiness. They are part of your collection of what psychology calls "positive mental resources" - something we'll come back to in a couple of week's time.

For now, just note what or who made you happy. Are there lessons to be learned?




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Normal @%!*#y People!


As we approach Black Friday and the madness induced by what we used to call in Ireland "The Sales", I'm reminded of my own impulsive by in those very "The Sales" all of 45 years ago, when I was in my first job.

After lunch, I arrived back into the office with an enormously long and cumbersome brown cardboard box... I'd treated myself to a projector screen for watching home movies! And, yes, it was a bargain!!

As I struggled past my boss's office, he emerged and, with a grin, asked me "Wonderful - how much did you save today?"

All that said, don't forget, being the most important person in your own life, you deserve the odd treat.






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